Thursday, 28 April 2011

One Language

I am in love with this bag from One Language; it is everything that I like in a bag: it's stylish yet casual, oversized so you  could practically fit anything into it, and most of all it's so pretty (I am especially in love with the handwriting lining). But at USD $110 not including tax and not including shipping, if I was to get it it would roughly amount to $140. Granted that it is the bag plus a laptop bag that is of a similar design, but it's still very much pricey and something that I could definitely not afford for myself. But it is so pretty and I really do wish I have the funds to buy it. Okay, that's a lie. I do have the funds but I can't justify the massive splurge on this bag. I mean, for that same amount of money I could practically buy a decent pair of leather boots. Oh well, perhaps I'll find a rich guy (isn't that what all girls want ... poor guys) who shall buy me this bag. Or a generous friend (though I have doubts).
Wednesday, 27 April 2011

Existential Crisis

What is an existential crisis? Well according to the incredibly reliable source known as Wikipedia, it is "a stage of development at which an individual questions the very foundations of his or her life: whether their life has any meaning, purpose or value". I realise that I am very much an introverted individual who undertakes a lot of introspection. Somehow, it makes sense to try to break down aspects of my life into manageable ideas so that that I can learn from then because I value personal development. I value growing and developing as a person, because to me, there is nothing more tragic than being stuck as the immature, unwordly individual. And yet, (and I shall get off my high horse) it's just so sad when I realise that I may simply be overthinking about life when life itself cannot be rationalised or predicted due to the sheer amount of varibles (each person is controlled by their own moral centre which I am not able to predict). Perhaps I am going about life the wrong way, the painful way, the hard way where I will only be disappointed by people since they don't act the way according to the patterns that I have observed from past experiences. I am aware of all this, and yet, I can't help being this way. I can't help but feel so helpless in this big world.

Something else that I value is being happy with oneself. I find that so important (and perhaps this is a harsh way of looking at things), but, at the end of the day all you have is yourself and it's terribly hard to live your life (I believe) if you aren't even happy with yourself. I think I used to be happy and content. Now I'm not so sure.  I saw my primary school best friend, K, and she was dressed in business wear attire and it just made me think about my own future. She is someone who will definitely become some powerful and successful barrister, one day in the future. I'm not even sure where I want to be. It made me realise, perhaps if I can answer the following questions then I can believe in something more.
  1. What do I want to do in the future? 
  2. Who am I?
  3. What do I want?

I know what I want, which may seem contradictory to my 3rd question. But perhaps my goal needs to more internally centered because my current aspiration is something beyond my control since it relies on external factors and people to act a certain way (linking back to paragraph 1) that's just not possible. It's not healthy to rely so much on other people's actions to determine your own happiness, and I am aware of that and yet it's hard to do otherwise. We are human and we need relationships to survive. It's a necessity, right after food, shelter and water; relationships and having connections is what we all need to survive. I guess all in all: people confuse me and I wish I wasn't so confused because I think it is affecting my quality of life.

Everyone has an angel. A guardian who watches over us. We can’t know what form they will take. One day, old man. Next day, little girl. But don’t let appearances fool you. They can be as fierce as any dragon. Yet they’re not here to fight our battles, but to whisper from our heart, reminding that it’s us, it’s every one of us who holds the power over the worlds we create.

Who honors those we love with the very life we live? Who sends monsters to kill us, and at the same time sings that we will never die? Who teaches us what’s real, and how to laugh at lies? Who decides why we live, and what we’ll die to defend? Who chains us, and who holds the key that can set us free? It’s you. You have all the weapons you need. Now fight.
~ Sucker Punch

  I believe that quote from Suckerpunch is amazing and inspirational. Now I need to figure who I am and what I really want in life to then 'fight' for it.

Lunch and Dinner at the City

Firstly I'd just like to say I am terribly sorry for not updating in such a long time -over a month now. University has been fairly hectic as of late and I also have a ton of other excuses. But nevertheless, I am back (for now at least) and my day spent at the city with friends.

C, L and I went to Mad Pizza e Bar and the place is so quaint and really unique. The wait for the food was fairly substantial. However it was absolutely amazing and such freshness. I had ordered the amalfi pizza to share (sweet tiger prawns, ricotta, garlic, chilli flakes & roma tomato's w/ fresh mint leaves), L ordered penne è pollo (penne pasta w/ chicken, bacon, broccoli, red onion & basil served w/ white win cream sauce) whilst C ordered a suprema pizza (not pictured). All of them were amazing, though the pasta was a tad too creamy for my liking, thus making it incredibly rich and filling.

Afterwards, C and L went as I had to meet up with E later on thus I spent 2 hours wandering the back and side streets near the city and really, discovering how beautiful the city that I live in is. Everyone admires how beautiful other cities are when they travel, but it's so much harder to try to look at your surroundings through the eyes of a foreigner. And when you do, you really realise how beautiful and lucky you are. Well, I shouldn't generalise, but that is how I feel at least.

E and I had originally planned on eating elsewhere, but then decided for Mamak since she wanted to try it out. I ordered the nasi goreng (fried rice essentially) and she ordered the nasi lemak with fried chicken (not pictured). She wasn't impressed with it (and from the presentation, neither was I). I do believe that Mamak is overrated. Yes the food is so-so, fairly efficient kitchen and the prices are fairly cheap. However, does it justify the massive queue? Not really.

We went around the corner to a store selling traditional Twainese dessert and I ordered Taro Balls with glutinous cake, jelly noodles and pearls. Definitely not my kind of dessert, I really dislike the texture of .. well everything. It is this chewy, slimy type starch ball and ice shavings consumed in (E guessed) sugar cane syrup. So the entire dessert was sickening sweet and being a person that hates to waste food, I only ate around 1/4 of it before I stopped. Never trying it again.

I have a pen pal from Singapore and today I received her letter (finally) after a month wait. It's so weird to write letters, and yet so lovely at the same time.